New York, New York!

No, this isn't photographic evidence of Orlando finally breaking down after he realised the second Icelandic Volcano didn't go off in time to save him from a Mantis session. Neither is it him reacting to the news that the PM had invested in a state of the art electric prong to keep him from getting away again - its Orlando at Sundance pissing about - cute!

Anyway, Mystic was totally right, Orlando is in New York - according to the gospel of all things true Twitter he was at the MOMO viewing a piece of Performance art (there was also some strange sighting of Orlando staring and nude people, you can't honestly blame him getting an eyeful while he can, I can imagine the Panty Mantis is hard to spot without clothes on...)

The Panty Mantis was also there, described as "Orlando's clingy girlfriend" in one report, (that made me laugh) and all of them reported how shockingly skinny she was. Looking at them together you can imagine the convo...



"Oye Orlandoe duz mye bumm looke bigge iyn this"

Ok Ok, I'm just being unkind and unrealistic, she's probably just saying

"Yew gette awaiy frome mee agian Orlandoe and eye will kille yew"

Also nice to see what her figure does in terms of inspiring the average person on the street, particularly given Treashure Urself is due out soon. One twitterer decided she was only going to have a slimmer shake and some fat free yogurt all day after running into the Panty Mantis - what a great healthy living role model she is!

Happy Bankholiday!

Its Monday and 90% of the UK have the day off, and from what I gather from friends in America they all have the day off too - so HAPPY BANKHOLIDAY / MEMORIAL DAY! :D

As per usual when Orlando is in the UK it goes very quiet, I'm glad that he seems to feel the UK is not a place for pimping! Long may that continue

In the meantime we've also had a bit more of an update about Albert Nobbs. I hadn't realised that this book / movie dealt with the issues of transgender / transexulism (sorry without reading the book I'm not sure which). Both are an interesting topic and one that society at large is only just coming to terms with and I can imagine its going to make for rather an interesting Movie.

OB's character sounds right up his street too - handyman/gardner with a pension for the ladies, LOL thats a role he's played a few times before on and off set I'm sure!

Moving on - The Katz lecture in New York is scheduled for the 4th of June too, Its being billed as 'Orlando Bloom opening up about his dyslexia", it will be interesting if he actually does. Something I learn't recently is that alot of dyslexics also can be dyspraxic (ie appearing clumsy, not quite in control of all their limbs) - I reckon I can actually see that on OB, the way he moves etc..... maybe it explains the amount of accidents he seems to have too, if that is the case then doing the gym / yoga etc will really help - it gives you much better control on your movements and a better awareness of your body!

Looking Forward

I thought it a good time to take a look forward to the next year for Orlando. Seeing him on the Red Carpet again with lots of people yelling at him reminded me of the good old days. It was also rather interesting proof that his "keeping out there' campaign by hauling his Panty Mantis round the world obviously has worked on some levels, the reception he got out on the carpet and in the Royal Festival Hall demonstrated people still knew who he is!!

So, in the next year he's apparently filming Albert Nobbs and the Three Musketeers. For once, I think both of these may have more than a snowballs chance in hell of getting released, particularly the last one. For anyone putting money on a movie there is a strong cast and as far as OB goes, he is in a role which he has proven ability at box office wise, Albert Nobbs I'm less sure about in terms of will it be released (though of course having Glenn Close in it is a big brucie bonus).

All ribbing of Orlando aside, it would be nice to see him making some kind of comeback, putting down less worthy distractions and getting back to being on the silver screen..

Its also nice to see him back in the UK again, he always seems to have
more gravitas and dignity on home ground (unlike someone else I could
mention, who seems to have even less dignity when she returns to Oz than
usual.. that really is an achievement).

Pssst Orlando.....

.......You are meant to look at the camera being pointed at you by your patient fan, whose probably been waiting for that moment for a while, not the hired photographers.....

Orlando and the Half Blood Prince

Orlando was presenting at the NMA in London last night - Here he is on the red carpet looking rather sultry!

I saw a kind of irony in the fact he was giving an award to some of the cast from Harry Potter, I can remember OB responding to a question on LOTR v Harry Potter back in days and making some joke about who took who in the success stakes. For me if you put LOTR in comparison with pretty much any other movie, LOTR wins hands down. But whether its just because there are more movies being made or the immense popularity of JK Rowlings books, Daniel Radcliffe is still up there receiving awards for his work, OB only seems to be there to present them...

On thing that did strike me in the you tube clip is that OB is looking very grown up for once, though that may be because he's on a stage with someone that is for ever going to be stuck as the kid with the specs and the scar, however much he gets his bits out on stage (Sorry Daniel.... )

Let hope next year see's some of Orlando's movies in Cinemas and being acclaimed!

Prada diver

Diving while wearing Prada in Cairns - life was tough in the 50's

Whats Wild and Hot?

Orlando with big hair! - Apparently back in London and apparently filming (though i don't know what he's filming...... none of his recent new projects should have started yet...)

Looks like he has a new haircut and beard trim though - much better! Plus the Jacket is kinda nice - though he must be a bit on the warm side, the temperature might of dropped from yesterday but its hardly coat weather!!

ETA: I was trying to work out how the Gossip Girls had got photos of him... but then it all became clear - Jared is evidently back on the payroll, just a bit slow at uploading! Rumour has it he's doing more Me & City ads (that would explain the new outfit!)

Bad Ass Orlando: Finally!!

Whoop whoop! Orlando has "officially" signed on to be the bad guy in this movie according to here (among other sources out there).

I'm well excited about this one, back to tights / boots and riding around but with the added bonus that he won't be sickly sweet and righteous! Yippeee!

Bad Ass Orlando is something I've been wanting to see on screen for a while, though of course whether it makes it onto screen is another point, c'mon OB, make this the one that gets through without a years delay and counting...

He's also due back in London apparently for the National Movie Awards on wednesday - always nice to have him back home.... and with a bit of luck that volcano will kick off again and keep him mantis free again for a bit!

So, to summarise both posts today

Orlando = new movie opportunity and trip to London
Panty Mantis = no movie opportunity, instead she's hocking bad advice to who ever will listen, modelling cheap underwear and getting her baps out - (yes that was particularly nasty, I'm stuck in an office again looking at the sunshine :()

Victoria Bl**dy Sekrits

Oh goodeee, another VS model that has decided to try and make her way into the world of acting..

The Panty Mantis must be a bit peeved though, recently the gossip sites have been in full throttle discussing which actress / knicker model will be in the running to take over from Megan Fox for the new Transformers movie..it came too about three or four, one of which was the Panty Mantis (another of which was Gemma Arterton).

Then low and behold, straight from left field, courtesy of Geek Week, came the news that Rosie Huntingdon-wawa had get the coveted spot....

One the one hand bleugh.... Models are not the same as actresses. Last time I checked you needed some training and skill to act (there is some cracking clip of our Mantis in a TV sitcom that proves that somewhere around - if anyone is able to link me up, I'd be ever so grateful, I could do with a laugh to start monday off..).

On the other hand, it could be extremely funny and what a shame our own pet mantis apparently didn't get the role.... I thought it was too good to be true..

arggggghh i HATE Victoria Bl**dy Sekrits, do they have some gadget in HQ that turns normal women into vapid airheads, prancing around in their badly made and overpriced underwear pretending to save the world???

Sorry, I had to get that off my chest.. moving on -T
I also hear that the three Musketeers is mean't to start filming in August, so IF Orlando is on board - that would be mean him having a very busy summer what with Albert Nobbs in July.

I've said it before and I'll say it again - GET ONE OF THESE SUCKERS IN A MOVIE THEATRE Pleeeeease Orlando, otherwise we are going to be threatened with watching Victoria Sekrits models trying to demonstrate their "craft"...

Genetically Blessed?

Ah Look! Its our genetically blessed couple privately going about their business.

Don't they look happy? And doesn't the Panty Mantis look genetically blessed indeed? I sure wish I looked like that. Still, its nice to see her brandishing a pot of salad dressing for lunch - maybe thats her 20% treat for the day?

The Panty Mantis has had a field day giving advice all over the place in preparation for her trip to Oz, sadly its not been very well received - most people seem to think she's spouting rose tinted shyte.....

They must all be fat'n'jellus - even the blokes!

moi je joue

Lately,

my little love

drake celebrations with my bests

thanks for the flowers Daddy

my new/old boots

hanging out with my other undead pals

beautiful zoe and alex

my bed, I miss it

wrap party at beaconsfield

Craig, my pretend boyfriend for a weekend (his band is We Are the Take, check them out!)

filming at 134 Ossington - Evan Biddell & Joe Fuda's space

With Evan, one of Toronto's best designers/enfant terrible

Joe Fuda in action

way better than the Chanel temp tattoos

my favourite nail polish shade - Sally Hansen's Lavender Cloud

wearing my favourite new sweater by Horace with three of the coolest girls I know

xo E

Hart attack

The fresh face of Seafolly with the smile to die for, Jessica Hart

Shocking News

I know I know.... this blog is about Orlando - and here I am YET again putting something up about the Panty Mantis... but this is just too much for me to pass up, Apparently in the last few weeks she allegedly (as in according to her) seems to have grown more than one braincell.... translation (as usual) is in Bold:

MIRANDA Kerr puts personality ahead of good looks when it comes to guys.

Shouldn't that read "Panty Mantis puts famewhoring ahead of anything else when it comes to guys"

The Aussie supermodel — who’s currently dating British actor Orlando Bloom — says her ideal man would have a good sense of humor.


I don't know about that but I'll bet her ideal man would need a good sense of humour to laugh his way through all the painful PR set ups and proposal rumours; that and being hard of hearing to avoid her voice AND a padded body suit to avoid all the bones... (obviously feeling bytchy :D)

Also, I'm assuming that dating and contracting are interchangeable here?

“Personally, I believe that women need to be stimulated mentally by the man,” she told Britain’s GQ magazine. “It’s not necessarily about his looks.

ah yes - the nearly published author is coming to the fore, NOW she's "written" a book, she can only handle intellectually stimulating men....

“It’s more about being stimulated mentally, like when a man is funny or he is witty or charming, I think that’s attractive.

I take it she classes copious PR opportunities as being stimulated mentally.... see I was right, now she's nearly an author she's gone all academic and clever....

“It’s all about personality, really.”


Actions speak louder than words PM... it seems more to be about how enormous the bank balance is and how big the celebrity..

Miranda recently insisted she loves looking after her body, and would do so even if she wasn’t in fashion.


I'm taking it that by "in fashion" they mean "in lads mags"

“Regardless of whether I was doing this job or not I would be taking care of my body,” she said earlier this month.

Happily she also has a book on just this coming out at some undisclosed date... isn't that fortuitous!

“It’s something that I’ve always believed in growing up.

“We always ate organic vegetables. Taking care of my mind, body and soul is very important. Yoga is very good for me.”

yes we know... organic veg, 2 hrs of yoga a day, goji berrys, noni juice and 24/7 use of Kora...
----------
sorry, i'm just really tired of this Shyte....(and fatnjellus obviously too!)

Basil the Beetle.....

This is cute and yet another perfect example of how Orlando manages to move through life under the radar when he's with people he cares about (!!). Apparently OB's mum wrote a kiddies book called Basil the Beetle's scary Adventure.... bless!

Very cute title, very cute Beetle name. In fact both are almost as cute as the photo of Orlando peering into Basil's home...



(Original Photo source)

Maybe Orlando is identifying with Basil, after all people always seem to describe being a celebrity as "living in a bit of a goldfish bowl" (though of course that depends on whether you call in the fishermen in the first place, but I've made that point before and this is meant to be a nice post!)

Its really nice to Sam there as well! His mum must of been a bit of a glamour puss when she was younger, she always seems to dress up for things

unlike her offspring....

I've given up on Orlando (he's Capricorn, so is my sister and neither of them seem to enjoy looking smart) but Sam should embrace her inner Leo! I've got a birthday a couple of days after hers and I consistently over dress for absolutely everything - I reckon its as all part of representing the Lion's mane :D

Keeniless

A rare sight?

The posters of this youtube video seem to think that this is a rare sight..... mind you they seem to think that its rare to see Orlando.

I'd disagree! he poses with his pap friends regularly, its just rare to see him turning up to something that involves work in the public domain..

C'mon Orlando - get one of these suckers out on general release... all I'm seeing of you is set ups with your pet Mantis and the odd hairy photos of you on your own - its hard to keep the faith you know?

It is nice to see him signing things for his fans again though.....

Blimey!

I must be slow on the uptake - is this guy hot or what .... Reminds me of a younger OB in fact... I'm seriously considering another blogspot that focuses on his overall hawtnesss... mind you, I doubt he manages to get up to Orlando's level of antics and he certainly isn't dating the Panty Mantis.... yet

Orlando, this is what you did to yourself...... you went from this pre-mantis:



to this post mantis:



Now admittedly there is a limit to what a Panty Mantis can do to a guy that is that good looking, but no-wonder he's trying to hide his phace in the last photo... on someone that genetically blessed, that photo is the equivalent of jaba the hut on the average person....

Caption Time...

Orlando smiled happily at the waiting photographers.

"I may not have been able to manage a caption birds eye look" he thought, "and lawd knows I've tried, but I've definitely got more facial hair than the other two"

Harry high

Someone had to do it....the return of the bare all, hip revealing, 80's onesie. Seriously get me a red one and a set of boobs asap. No Hoff jokes here. Who else but the "yes we're tacky, but god do we know how to pitch it" American Apparel.

A Whole lotta Beard...

Obviously I don't pay attention to dates very closely.... apparently it was Jerry's Party last night...... Orlando was there looking rather cute.

What I also didn't realise is that they'd hold a competition for the best looking beard. Orlando made it through the elimination rounds



it all came down to a tie breaker apparently between OB and Jonathan Pryce,



Orlando WON! (though I'm not sure how, that beard has barely gravitated from Bum fluff whereas JP's working the whole captain birdseye look)



As part of his lap of honor he got to judge the caliber of beards in the audience and to identify a winner..



and here's the winner Harriet, 37 from West Brunswick:



Apparently she won beard trimming classes with Orlando (not that I'm jellus or anything but I'd say both of them could do with it..)